Most likely with many devotional writers, there is a lot of history behind what is written. I know this is true for me.
I’ve had lots of practice letting go of worry, not getting too far ahead of doctors, waiting for results, and treatment plans. Psalm 27:1-14 jumps to life for me when it exhorts us to “Wait for the Lord.” In my first devotional of April 2019, I mentioned I had been diagnosed with stage four breast cancer. It had metastasized throughout my body so it was too late for surgery. Without treatment, I didn’t have long to live. Quickly, my community surrounded my husband and me with prayer and support of all kinds. As I wrote then, sharing our burden made the weight of our circumstances lighter.
But “Wait for the Lord”? For what was I waiting? To be healed or not? Clearly some die from cancer and some do not. Was I to demand the Lord give me what I wanted like my grandchildren wanting to fly now to see us? Things I didn’t have control over had to be let go. I quickly found out I didn’t want to be defined by cancer. I continued life within the constraints of my illness; energy level, ability, doctors’ appointments, etc. My oncologist appreciated I wasn’t just waiting for the next appoint but had activities and travel plans between treatments. Ultimately, I discovered waiting is about hope in the Lord Jesus, his redemption and coming again. His promise for now and for the future.
It’s been two years now with cancer free scans. There are residual effects from the medicines but even those have diminished. My friends call me a walking miracle. The miracle is not just that I’m healed but that Jesus died for my sins, was buried, rose from the dead, ascended into heaven and is coming again. He did this for me and you.