Remembering and Pondering—Then and Now

Rebekah and Isaac were in love, but she was barren. Yet she was not unique; throughout scripture, key roles are played by women who are barren—Hannah the mother of Samuel the prophet, the “nameless” mother of Samson the judge, and Elizabeth, the mother of John the Baptist. Theologically, this phenomenon indicates that God can use us as God sees fit, despite any of the ways in which we might seem barren.

Every two years at our monastery, the abbot of our Mother House makes a “Visitation,” working and praying alongside us and interviewing each of us privately. A “Visitation Card”—like a report card or an annual review—is the frightening result.

Scripture serves as a visitation card for all of us, and the prophets are hard graders. Do any of us make the honor roll? “Be ye therefore perfect,” instructs Jesus (Matt. 5:48, kjv). In fact, “When you have done all that is commanded you, say, ‘We are unworthy servants; we have only done what was our duty’” (Luke 17:10, rsv). I can manage perfection for perhaps a few hours on a sunny day.

Christianity is about the barren yet fruitful; the lost yet found; fallen yet raised; tainted yet cleansed; sick yet healed; arrogant yet humbled; guilty yet forgiven; unlovable yet loved. Grace is amazing, offered not as a “because” but as a “nevertheless.” As John insists, it is “not that we loved God but that [God] loved us” (1 John 4:10). Strangely, our major undoing is the difficulty we have in accepting gifts.